As course designer for the Detroit Free Press/Flagstar Bank Marathon, the number-one question I receive from runners is, "Where will the porta-johns be located?" Finding a place to take care of one's personal needs is always a big concern.

Years ago, New Orleans Mardi Gras Marathon organizers underestimated the number of porta-johns needed near the start line. Runners, including myself, tried to find every nearby hiding place to relieve themselves.

The police chief spotted me and asked, "What would you do if your sister was standing here?" I replied, "Doing what I need to do." One runner was arrested for indecent exposure. Others surrounded the squad car demanding the officer let him out.

As I stood and watched, I overheard the chief say this race would never come back to his jurisdiction. It never did.

For last year's Free Press Marathon, race coordinator Dennis Handley set up 30 porta-johns. For some reason, runners only stood in line for the first 15; the others weren't used despite volunteers urging runners to line up farther down.

The New York City Marathon has to resort to different measures to accommodate 20,000-plus runners who gather on Staten Island for the start. As part of the race's elite group for several years, I recall being escorted to the start past what was billed as the word's longest urinal.

Some of the foreign elites were surprised to see so many runners, men and women, openly taking care of business.

Runners have many tales about Mother Nature's urgency. Handley recalls sitting in an outhouse after the Cherry Festival Run in Traverse City, only to have the floor collapse. He ended up in ankle-deep in doo-doo. Fellow runners nicknamed him "Stinky" and, at a campfire that evening, burned his clothes.

Northville's Mike Webster is well known for missing race starts due to doo-doo duties. During one Boston Marathon, he had to convince boisterous spectators to let him pass through them to a porta-john. They thought he was quitting and did not want to let him through. As he came back onto the course, the crowd gave him thunderous applause. When Mike re-entered the race, runners near him shared hearty laughter about his plight.

I remember one woman who voiced concern to me that she never had to go to the bathroom before a race. When I asked why that was a problem, she said she was afraid she would need to go while on the course.

I told her two things. One, that most marathons had bathrooms out on the course; and two, that maybe she wasn't nervous enough before the start.

She found me after the race and exclaimed with glee that she'd been able to relieve herself before starting. I laughed so hard over her excitement I had to run off to the bathroom.

Columnist Doug Kurtis, who holds world records with 40 marathon wins and 76 sub-2:20 marathons, is privy to many stories. He may be contacted at dkurtis@peoplepc.com. MR